Stop the Clock
Women constantly ask me, "How long should it take to orgasm?" That's like asking me, "How long should a piece of string be?" (Plus, I hate the word "should"!) If you trip over your tongue just by looking at a guy and it's the first time his hands have gone south and you've just ripped each other's clothes off after a night out, you might orgasm in two minutes flat. If it's your partner of 10 years and you're tired and stressed and the kids are sleeping a few rooms away, it might take two hours. Statistics vary wildly, because this is something that's totally dependant on circumstances. Some say it takes an average of 20 minutes for a woman to orgasm; others say eight minutes of direct clitoral stimulation will do the trick. I say eight to ten minutes of direct contact sounds about right — but it totally depends on the variables.
His sexual system is simple. It's like a connect-the-dots game. On the other hand, to say that the woman's sexual system is complicated would be like saying you only need to be pretty good at math to be a rocket scientist! If you don't show or tell him how to touch you — and I mean when, where, how hard, how fast… in as much detail as possible — you might as well both give up right there and then. It's seriously not half as embarrassing as you think it is. Try simply opening your mouth and letting out a little moan to let him know you're enjoying what he's doing. Or give a sexy one-word command, like, "Softer." Take baby steps and you'll get there.