10 Reasons Why Men Love Bitches

What's the matter with using a little sweet talk (and the occasional pout) to get what you want from the opposite sex? Everything, according to Sherry Argov, author of Why Men Love Bitches -- at least when it comes to having a successful relationship. The secret to getting men to respond, she says, is a no-nonsense attitude. Rather than relying on guilt, a bitch demands respect from the start. In this context, being bitchy isn't about being nasty or rude. It's about having pride, integrity and a life of your own -- and it works wonders with men. Read this excerpt from Sherry's book to find out why:

1. She maintains her independence.
It doesn't matter if she is the CEO of a company or a waitress at Denny's. She earns an honest living. She has honor, and she isn't standing there with her hand out.

2. She doesn't pursue him.
The moon and the sun and the stars don't revolve around him. She doesn't make her dates with him when her horoscope advises that his big Mercury is about to retrograde in her little Venus. She doesn't chase him or keep tabs on him. He is not the center of the world.

3. She is mysterious.
There is a difference between honesty and disclosure. She is honest but does not reveal everything. She isn't verbally putting her cards on the table. Familiarity breeds contempt and predictability breeds boredom.

She doesn't see him every night or leave long messages on his machine. She isn't on a first-name basis with his secretary in one week. Men equate longing with love. Longing is good.

5. She doesn't let him see her sweat.
She keeps communication from getting messy and avoids communicating when upset. When she clears her head, she is succinct and speaks in a "bottom line" way.

6. She remains in control of her time.
She takes it slowly, especially when he wants to hurry. She moves to her rhythm, not his, preventing him from taking control of her.

7. She maintains a sense of humor.
A sense of humor lets him know she is detached. However, she doesn't treat disrespect as a laughing matter.

8. She places a high value on herself.
When he gives her a compliment, she says thank you. She doesn't talk him out of it. She doesn't ask what the ex looked like and doesn't compete with other women.

9. She is passionate about something other than him.
When he feels he isn't the "be all and end all" of her existence, it makes her more desirable. Staying busy ensures she isn't resentful if he is unavailable. He doesn't have a monopoly on the rent space in her head. He doesn't get Park Place, and he doesn't get Boardwalk. He gets one of those little purple properties next to Go.

10. She treats her body like a finely tuned machine.
She maintains her appearance and health. A person's self-respect is reflected in how he or she maintains physical appearance. If he tells her he doesn't like red lipstick, she wears it anyway, if it makes her feel good.

Reprinted with permission from Why Men Love Bitches. Copyright © 2002 by Sherry Argov, Adams Media, Avon, MA.

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