19 Clever Pickup-Line Comebacks

If we had a dollar for every time we've heard a lame pickup line... we'd be rich enough to buy our own drinks.

If we had a dollar for every time we've heard a lame pickup line... we'd be rich enough to buy our own drinks, thank you very much! Ever wonder what the perfect comeback would be to convey just how not interested we are? For help, we went straight to the source — our friends from Answerology.com. Now we can give Mr. Old Enough to Be Our Dad, Mr. Shorter Than Us...Without Heels, Mr. Popped Collar and even Mr. Drunk Enough to Be Escorted Out a taste of their own medicine.

 

He says: Can I buy you a drink?
You say: Actually, I'd rather have the money.

He says: I'm a photographer and I've been looking for a face like yours.
You say: I'm a plastic surgeon and I've been looking for a face like yours.

He says: Hi. Didn't we go on a date once? Or was it twice?
You say: Must've been once. I never make the same mistake twice.

He says: How did you get to be so beautiful?
You say: I must've been given your share.

He says: Will you go out with me this Saturday?
You say: Sorry, I'm having a headache this weekend.

He says: Your face must turn a few heads.
You say: And your face must turn a few stomachs.

He says: Go on, don't be shy. Ask me out!
You say: Okay, get out!

He says: I think I could make you very happy.
You say: Why? Are you leaving?

He says: What would you say if I asked you to marry me?
You say: Nothing. I can't talk and laugh at the same time.

He says: Can I have your name?
You say: Why? Don't you have one already?

He says: Shall we go see a movie?
You say: I've already seen it.

He says: Where have you been all my life?
You say: Hiding from you.

He says: Haven't I seen you someplace before?
You say: Yes, that's why I don't go there anymore.

He says: Is this seat empty?
You say: Yes, and this one will be if you sit down.

He says: So, what do you do for a living?
You say: I'm a female impersonator.

He says: Hey, baby, what's your sign?
You say: Do not enter.

He says: Your body is like a temple.
You say: Sorry, there are no services today.

He says: If I could see you naked, I'd die happy.
You say: If I could see you naked, I'd die laughing.

He says: Where have you been all my life?
You say: Where I'll be the rest of your life — in your wildest dreams.



Want to check out more featured questions? Head back to the Guys Tell All main page. Plus: Now you can read the full Guys Tell All archive of questions and answers right here!

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