“If the obesity epidemic needed a stimulus package, it would look much like the 24-fl.-oz. Oh Fudge! shake from Cold Stone Creamery, which sends a 1,920-calorie deposit of chocolate ice cream, milk, and fudge syrup into the bellies of those willing to pay $5.50 or more.”
Now THIS, my media industry friends, is the RIGHT way to open a press release. The PR flacks who bombard my Inbox with obviously automatically-generated messages starting, “Shawna lost 37 pounds on the All Cookie Diet, and so can MR. LESLIENEVERSAYDIET readers!” can learn something from the Center for Science in the Public Interest, a DC-based nonprofit health advocacy group that focuses on nutrition, food safety, and pro-health alcohol policies.
I myself haven't been to Cold Stone Creamery in about a year, but I'm pretty sure the last time my PMS actually ordered me in my Honda and drove me there herself, I ordered some sort of similar food porn, a la “Cake Batter ice cream mashed with PB cups, brownie chunks and caramel.” Except I probably had the poor teenage ice cream scooper mix in 75% “low fat” cake batter to make me feel better about my gorging.
Back to Oh Fudge! How much do I love this snarky quote by CSPI senior nutritionist Jayne Hurley?:
“If you really need an Oh Fudge! shake, find a Cold Stone Creamery that’s ten miles away from you, walk there, and then drink it on your ten-mile walk back.” Ha! “Even if calories are of no concern to you, the large Oh Fudge! shake has 69 grams of saturated fat—the kind of fat that clogs arteries and causes heart attacks. It’s like slurping up two pounds of T-bone steak and a buttered baked potato through a straw.”
The smaller-sized Oh Fudge! shakes, jammed with 1,250-1,660 calories, still dwarf a Burger King Double Whopper with Cheese, weighing in at “just” 1,000 calories.
A better option? My newest obsession: Skinny Cow ice cream cones. Low-fat chocolate ice cream, a crunchy sugar cone, finished off by a solid chocolate chunk in the base of the cone. (Technically, that is a “chocolatey” chunk, according to the website, but for a daily 150-calorite treat, I can pretend.)
If you like this kind of info, I encourage you to sign up for CSPI’s Nutrition Action Newsletter, which highlights a Food Porn product in each issue alongside a Right Stuff (aka healthy) rec. This month, it’s Quaker’s new whole-grain Oatmeal Pancake Mix, which I also happen to have in my kitchen cabinet. Pat, pat.
Do you have a fave summer chocolatey or ice-creamy treat? Spill/spread the love!