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Christmas is upon 30 Rock, which means a whole lot of scrambling… and disaster. In the most sweeping plotline, the writers invent an entire religion and/or holiday (Verducchianism) in order to avoid Kenneth's stringent Secret Santa rituals. Said religion involves free sausage pizza, the healing power of root beer, bisexual polygamy, and MerlinPeen (don't ask). Tracy eventually exposes their lie to Kenneth, causing him to lose all faith. For Kenneth, losing all faith apparently means developing five-o'clock shadow. Eventually, though, all the writers are punished for the heathenism.
Jack -- via the hot new social networking site "YouFace" -- reconnects with an old flame, Nancy Donovan from Bean Town. They both have the most insane Boston accents, like, ever. Under the advisement of Cerie, he grows increasingly fascinated with her as she changes her relationship status from "Married" to "Working On It" to "Weirdsies." They go out on a solo date, which reminds Jack of what his life used to be like before he was a high-powered executive. Nancy returns and gives Jack the greatest gift of all -- a reminder of what it was like to be his high school self.
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