Photo Credit: Joseph Cultice/NBC
If you’ve been waiting for Mr. Right to land on your doorstep…well, that might be why you still haven't found him. Dating is hard work -- that’s why we asked matchmakers Tracy McMillan, Matt Hussey and Amber Kelleher-Andrews for a little advice. This soul mate-finding trio stars on NBC’s new reality series, Ready for Love (premieres April 9, 9 p.m. ET, NBC), where they help three bachelors who want to settle down. And if these pros are good enough for series producer Eva Longoria to enlist to find these guys "the one," then they are definitely worth listening to! Here are their No. 1 tips for the single lady who is "ready for love."
Amber Kelleher-Andrews’ tip: Hang out with people who share your interests
“A location with a fun venue is always a good place to meet your mate,” says Kelleher-Andrews, who is the CEO of Kelleher International, a company that matches busy executives with their perfect mates. “Find a place where interacting around similar interests is the main focus and not a place where the ‘pick up’ vibe takes center stage.” So ditch the bar scene and spend more time on your hobbies!
“Do your best to match yourself with the activity, ie., if you are an athlete, sign up for a ski trip; if you like to cook, find a local cooking class," Kelleher-Andrews suggests. “Bottom line: If you surround yourself with like-minded individuals, you're off to a great start!”
Matt Hussey’s tip: Make yourself approachable
“Now that you’re ready, you need to be out there meeting men -- a lot of them!” says Hussey, creator of the GetTheGuy program for women in search of a serious relationship. “But this can’t involve just going out and waiting for guys to approach you,” he adds. “Most guys are terrified of the idea of coming up to you because they fear your rejection. You have to give a guy a license to approach.”
Hussey suggests this three-pronged plan: “First, give him solid eye contact for 1-2 seconds, followed by a slight smile before you look away. Next, get closer to him. It’s much easier for a guy to say something to you when he doesn’t have to walk across the room to do it. Third, say something casual, which shows him you are open to talking. For example: ‘I love your glasses’ or ‘What do you recommend to eat here?’ or even a simple ‘Hi’ will suffice. Remember: The more attractive a guy finds you, the less likely he is to approach -- so give him a break!”
Tracy McMillan’s tip: Look inside for the answers
“The biggest barriers to getting what you want in life are usually within,” explains Tracy McMillan, author of Why You’re Not Married…Yet. “If you want to be in a relationship and you’re not, stop asking where all the guys are. Start asking yourself where you are!”
Start your self-examination with this question: Are you really ready for love? “You might want love, by that’s different than being ready,” McMillan says. “Being ready involves, first and foremost, being willing. And if you’re afraid it will never happen, you’re not willing yet.”
Willingness, McMillan says, is a practice. So try this: “Notice how often you find yourself doubting a great relationship will come into your life,” she says. “Every time you have this thought -- you might be surprised at how often -- ‘correct’ the belief by affirming that you are open, willing, and ready. Do this until you realize where all the guys are -- everywhere!”