6 Types of Men Who Will Break Your Heart

"We need to find a way to liberate the sitcom from television. We can do sitcoms in the park if we have to! In fact, I already have a project to do sitcoms in the park. A lot of the more edgy producers who have been burned by Hollywood are interested. If it's good, and of course it will be good, people will come. Interested?"

Oh yeah, we were interested. Interested in checking him into the nearest NUTHOUSE.

"Brad is such a Renaissance man," Meg said fondly. She is no longer with him. She is now -- I swear this is true -- with a Baldwin brother.

Convicts and Married Men

I'm sure everyone knows this but, just in case, do not decide that any of the following could be kinda maybe okay if only you could change them a little bit, or maybe if they had a good woman's love:

Convicted felons are never appropriate. God only knows what they got up to in jail. Yes, drug dealers and inside traders do fall into this category. Even if we ignore any morality in making a decision, these guys' lives are way too big and unwieldy. They'll never fold the laundry.

Also, while it may be true that, as a group, serial killers are better-looking than your average man, hell, some of them are dishy, do not decide to become engaged to one.

Warning signs that your date is a serial killer:

  1. Hates animals
  2. Antisocial
  3. String hair
  4. Eyes snap open in the middle of the night
  5. Not on a bowling team
  6. Often really cranky
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