'90210' Recap: Trick or Treat

Trick or treat, bitches. It's Halloween in the Bev Niner. Of course, the writers blow it (as always) and barely acknowledge the holiday -- save a few plot-propelling discussions about the Beach Club's annual party -- until the episode is nearly over. Aside from one big shocker at the :59 mark, it all adds up to the visual equivalent of scrounging through the half-opened, once-melted candy at the bottom of your pillowcase three months after Halloween. And an entire Halloween-themed hour sans Nicky Driscoll? Unacceptable. Goobers: Annie and Kris Jr. get closer, despite pretty much everyone in the world telling her he's mondo creepy. She can only hear the mainstream hegemony talking, though, because she's, like, so on the margins now. She's all, "Damn you, preppies! Damn you and all your white-bread non-hobo-killin' values!" Ummmm, Annie. Remember how you're from frickin' Kansas? And the white-bread-iest person in the world? Easy to forget, I suppose. Especially when she's "borrowing" vintage Rolls Royces (seriously?) for joy rides to film a "scene" for Kris Jr.'s "movie." He actually sucks her into that crap with, "Remember, you're my muse, babe." God, this is embarrassing for everyone concerned.

Milk Duds: Thanks to Jackie's need for constant care, Silver struggles to keep her head above water school-wise. In particular, she flakes out on a group project with Teddy. To prove that he's not a total arse, he covers for her to the detriment of his own grade. He later finds out how Jackie is dragging Silver down and finds her to bond and give her comfort since his mom conveniencidentally died, too. Apparently comfort in Teddy's world = lobbing balls off of roof tops. Whatever floats your boat, boss.


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