The Moviefile - What Do Joaquin Phonenix and Biggie Smalls Have In Common?

There must be some sort of Venn diagram which illustrates that the likelihood of a Hollywood actor to try his hand at rapping is directly proportional to how insufferable he is in other facets of his life. Let me give you an example: Did you know that Tom Green has released not one, but two hip hop albums? True story. By now you've probably seen the footage of Joaquin Phoenix onstage rapping (and promptly falling off the stage -- hee!) for some documentary Casey Affleck is producing about Phoenix's attempt to become a hip hopper. And just a couple days ago, Jim Carrey jumped up onstage with Fiddy Cent for no apparent reason.

I'm starting to fear this is becoming an all-out trend. Before all the media whores who have already released sex tapes and adopted kids from third world countries jump on this band wagon -- do we really need Paris Hilton's tribute to KRS-One? -- I've come up with a list of celebs I'd pay money to hear throw down a rhyme or two on wax, complete with their scientifically generated emcee names. Feel free to add your suggestions in the comments. Word to ya moms.

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