A_M_C: Isn't there a time though, when a woman's body just says no that it just can't be involved in an orgasm right now, but yet still wants the sex for the feeling?
Drpattisays: Yes, there are times when the body cannot go there, like in sheer exhaustion or with certain drugs.
A_M_C: Sort of like a "quickie" I guess, more pleasure for the man, but the woman will get her pleasure at another time.
Drpattisays: And then sex may be a physical release, but not a substantial one and lacking in satisfaction, emotionally for most. A woman can enjoy a quickie too, but most have already gone into the foreplay within before they do it expecting, anticipating, longing, yearning, all that. So, I look at the sexual continuum as if it were a ladder. After relaxing, sensually touch your partner. It's the kissing phase that ignites it all. Most women need deep passionate kissing. Not an "air kiss." Many women need to actually teach their men how to kiss. Then if we look at the ladder approach, we move from the head down. Breast stimulation is usually important to women for their arousal. Kissing biologically activates chemical action and nerve action starts the arousal process.
Jennkd: Kissing is good.
Drpattisays: Breasts and nipples are very important arousal areas for women and many need that stimulation to get hot. So, using the whole body is important for arousal to work in women. Now, as you all know, there are about three orifices to penetrate sexually, once oral sex has been done. Oral sex is NOT foreplay for most women. It's its own sexual act. I always suggest that couples engage in oral and that she gets her FIRST orgasms that way.