Ask the Stepfamily & Divorce Specialist: iVillage Community

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Ask the Stepfamily & Divorce Specialist Message Board

Join author Jann Blackstone Ford, founder of Bonus Families, an organization dedicated to promoting peaceful coexistence between divorced or separated parents and their new families. Becoming a bonus family does not happen over night. It takes work and determination, and each member of the family has to make the commitment.

Stepchildren come to us in all shapes and sizes with individual histories of their own. While the adult partners in a remarriage celebrate their relationship, the stepchild may still be mourning the loss of his or her old family. No matter how much time passes, this child will still harbor a secret wish that their dad and mom will eventually go back together. From the child's subconscious point of view, it may be much easier to just hate that new woman or cause enough trouble so she'll go away -- that way, the stepchild won't have to deal with all the bad feelings he doesn't understand, anyway.

If you've never participated in message board before, you'll be surprised by how easy it is to get answers to your questions from experienced moms. You don't need to be an iVillage member to read messages, but if you want to post, just click on the "join now" link at the very top right hand corner of the message board page. Membership is free and it just takes a few minutes to sign up.

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Resources for Ask the Stepfamily & Divorce Specialist
What is a Bonus Mom™?
Supporting the Bonus Family™
Stepparenting: When Discipline Styles are Different
Making Healthy Stepfamilies
8 Ways to Build a Healthy Stepfamily
Advice on Blending Families
How to Avoid Becoming the Wicked Stepmother
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