Tempted to have an affair? Worried that your significant other might meet another significant person? Read this excerpt from Adultery, The Forgivable Sin by Dr. Bonnie Eaker-Weil and get expert advice on resisting -- and preventing -- an affair.
Oscar Wilde once said that the only way to get rid of temptation was to yield to it, but remember: He ended up in jail.
Once you've established your boundaries, there are ways to patrol them and to minimize the threats from without and within.
If You Are the One Who Feels Tempted:
Ask yourself what you see in the other person that you cannot or do not get from your mate. Then ask your mate whether he or she would and could meet those needs.
If the attraction is purely physical, try to imagine your target 10 years older and 20 pounds heavier.
Make a list of the person's annoying habits, such as biting nails or smoking. (That skips the honeymoon stage and takes you straight to the power struggle.) Look at this negative list three times a day.
Draw up a list of the things you love about your mate. Look at this positive list three times a day. Tell your mate what's on this love list, and encourage more of the same.