The Biggest Parenting Mistakes: #4

Every day this week, I’ll be posting a different big "parenting mistake", so make sure to check back tomorrow!

MISTAKE #4. Not Using the Rule of 21
Correct: Faithfully stick to changing one behavior at least three weeks to reap results.

A big parenting mistake is not sticking to a behavior plan long enough. The result: No behavior change. Changing behavior is a gradual process requiring commitment and repetition. In fact, learning a new habit takes around 21 days of consistent work. By faithfully using the "Rule of 21" you're more likely to get the desired behavior result. Hint: Watch out for a "backslide effect" Just before behavior changes it sometimes worsens. The child is testing so don't give in!

  • Target 1 behavior. You won't be so overwhelmed and are more likely get lasting change.
  • Relay plan to at least one caregiver. You'll get faster results being on the same page.
  • Track efforts in a calendar. You'll “see” a gradual change that will keep you committed.
  • Commit to 21 days. Consistently stick to your plan for 21 days or however long it takes!

Michele Borba's 5 Biggest Parenting Mistakes:

  1. Failing to Teach “Replacer” Behaviors
  2. Not Using the Right Words the Right Way
  3. Setting Unrealistic Expectations
  4. Not Using the Rule of 21
  5. Not Letting Kids Experience Failure

Come back tomorrow for the next "biggest parenting mistake"!

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