Breakups aren't just upsetting — sometimes they can literally turn your life upside down. It's hard to eat; it's hard to sleep; and it's hard to think clearly. In this excerpt from her book, A Girlfriend's Guide to Getting Over Him, author Sandra Ann Miller lays down the law for the brokenhearted. She has created 10 essential ground rules to prevent the recently jilted from making the most common breakup mistakes. So if you're puffy-eyed and couch-bound (or know someone who is) print out these ground rules immediately. Read them, repeat them and live by them until he's totally out of your system — and trust us, eventually, he will be!
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Before we go any further, you need to make some promises to yourself. Raise your hand and repeat after me...
I, (state your name), do, hereby, solemnly swear that I will not behave in the manner of a crazy ex-girlfriend. I will not participate in foolish or destructive behavior. I promise to act in a dignified fashion and that means I will not do stupid things, no matter how I might rationalize them. Therefore, I vow the following:
- I will not call him. No matter what good or bad news I think he should hear only from me, I will not call him. Even if I am convinced it will make me feel better, I will not call him. I will not call him even to get my stuff. I'll have a friend do that, preferably via email.
- I will not email him. Not even an innocent and rather funny group email forward. I will not email him simply to give him back his stuff. I will not contact him at all.