Breakup Survival

Week Two: Surveying the (Newly) Single You

But rebuilding can also be tremendously exciting. You have the opportunity to renew every aspect of your life, if you choose. In the rebuilding process, you continue to sort through the rubble, making piles of things to keep and things to discard. Once you say good-bye to the rubble of your past relationship and haul it away, you'll have an assortment of ''keepers'' that you must reposition in your life. And suddenly you'll have all of this new space in which you make your life a custom fit. As you begin to cope with your feelings and acknowledge and accept the past, you'll make your way to a life brimming with new possibilities.

Sex and the Single Girl

As they rebuild, many women find themselves reawakening sexually. Because you're no longer operating in trauma mode, you now have more room and space for sexual feelings to reemerge.

As a newly single woman, one option is hitting the swinging scene of casual -- yet safe -- sex. For many women, this is a time of sexual experimentation where trying on a more liberal persona and fulfilling fantasies of single, sexual freedom can feel like stretching your wings after a long confinement.

However, don't be surprised if along with the intrigue of hopping into bed with someone comes some confusion. In fact, you might find that casual sex just isn't your style. As in all the changes you've undergone after your breakup, trusting your feelings is probably the best path. If you dive into sexual encounters against your better judgment just because you're lonely or because you think you should be using your freedom, you may get yourself into trouble, physically and emotionally.

In fact, while many women decide to experiment with their sexuality at this point, others decide to stay away from physical relationships and partnered sex for a while because they feel they need more time to heal. If you thing that getting into partnered sex could seriously disrupt any emotional equilibrium you've achieved, there's no reason not to hold off. Listen to your feelings and follow your needs.

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