Should Your Kids See 'Bully'? Here's the Rating You Should Use to Decide

As a parent, it's hard to watch the trailer of the powerful and heartbreaking new documentary Bully and not have your eyes fill with tears. (Watch it below.) While the movie was initially rated R by the MPAA (a move opposed by high-profile supporters like Justin Bieber and Johnny Depp), the film's distributor, the Weinstein Company, is releasing the movie as unrated so the target audience of teens will be able to see it. In lieu of an official rating, the company has asked parents and theaters to use this rating from Common Sense Media -- a Pause 13+. This means that some kids ages 13 and up can see the movie. The "pause" means: "Know your child: Some content may not be right for some kids." Here's Common Sense Media's review:

What parents need to know
Parents need to know that Bully is a no-holds-barred documentary that intimately portrays bullying victims' daily lives. While it's often heartbreaking and deals with tough issues like suicide, the movie addresses an incredibly important, timely topic -- bullying -- in a frank, relatable way that's age appropriate for teens and relevant for middle schoolers if an adult is present to guide discussion. Bully's strong language (including a brutal, profanity-laden scene in which one boy says to another that he'll "shove a broomstick up your a--" and "cut your face off and s--t") earned it an R rating from the MPAA (a rating that the production company chose not to accept, officially releasing the film as unrated), but none of the swearing is gratuitous. Like it or not, it's a realistic portrayal of what every middle schooler and older hears every day. This gives the film veracity and credibility with kids, and it will justifiably shock parents.

Bully's most challenging material isn't just the language, but the suicides. Seeing grieving parents and friends could potentially be upsetting to teens and preteens, so they should definitely watch with adults. Bully also addresses the concepts of cutting, physical abuse, and more, but in a way that presents the consequences as well as the behavior itself. Victims' parents are generally portrayed as supportive and loving, while school administrators come off in a much less positive light. Ultimately, Bully encourages kids to stand up to bullies, not stand by, and reinforces the fact that everyone can make a difference when it comes to this essential issue.

What's the story?
BULLY takes a frank, head-on look at the bullying epidemic happening in America's middle and high schools. It profiles several young victims -- including Alex, a 12-year-old in Sioux City, Iowa, who endures merciless teasing and physical abuse on the school bus every day, and Kelby, a 16-year-old in Tuttle, Okla., who has been ostracized and attacked ever since coming out as a lesbian. In telling their stories and others, Bully explores the full range of bullying's impact on kids, their families, and their communities, from the devastation of teen suicide to frustrated parents getting nowhere with school administrators. And, more than anything, it encourages teens to make a difference -- to stand up against bullying instead of standing by.

Is it any good?
Bully is heartbreaking, moving, infuriating, and indisputably essential viewing for middle- and high-schoolers and their parents. It's impossible not to be affected by the stories of these tweens and teens; you'll tear up when Tyler Long's parents recount what drove their 17-year-old firstborn to suicide, and you'll want to scream at the administrator who downplays Alex's parents' concerns when they come in to talk about how to keep their son safe on his way to and from school. Particularly chilling is the story of 14-year-old Ja'Meya, who ended up brandishing a gun at her bullies when she felt pushed to the edge of her endurance. No one was hurt, but the fact that she even considered that as a response to her situation shows you just how much pain some kids are in every day.

Bully is a little bit on the slow side for teens (and it might have been a better fit for school viewing at an hour's length), but it's also extremely relevant and relatable. It's gritty, but that very grittiness is what gives it the power to hook teens in and open their eyes to what's probably going on around them every day. And that, in turn, could help convince kids that they really do have the power to make a difference.

What families can talk about

  • Families can talk about an individual's responsibility to stand up, not stand by. Is that easy to do? How do you think people can really make a difference against bullies?
  • Parents, talk to your kids about teen suicide. This is an incredibly tough topic, but one that needs to be addressed. What makes some people think that it's their only option? What impact does their decision have on their friends and family? Where can kids in despair turn for assistance?
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  • Bullying is often seen as physical abuse, but Bully shows that words are just as powerful. Talk about the different ways that people can bully others; what has the most lasting impact?
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  • Bully doesn't spend too much time discussing the online/digital side of the issue. Teens: How does cyberbullying impact you and your peers?
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  • School administrators come off very poorly in Bully, and there's lots of blaming the victim. Do you think administrators leave victims feeling completely discounted? Who else can bullying victims turn to for help?

To get involved, log on to Twitter today, follow @BullyMovie and retweet this message: "13 million kids get bullied every year. It's time to take a stand. Repost to stop Bullying. #BullyMovie." And lend your voice to the cause by going to action.thebullyproject.com.

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