Have you seen these hysterical new SlimShots commercials?
They begin with a heavy cartoon gal talking about her once-seemingly endless battle of the bulge, trying low-carb low-fat, low-everything diets in an effort to lose weight (If only she knew a simple pencil eraser could whittle her physique down in 0.06 seconds). Then, she downs a SlimShot and ZWOOP! her waist shrinks to the size of a baby’s neck. What made me giggle out loud, though, was the written disclaimer at the bottom:
“CARTOON DRAMATIZATION: RESULTS NOT TYPICAL. CARTOONS LOSE WEIGHT EASILY. REAL PEOPLE REQUIRE DIET AND EXERCISE TO LOSE WEIGHT.”
Oh, REALLY? Humans need to watch what they eat and workout – we can’t just shrink down or make actual steam blow out of our ears, accompanied by a loud train noise, to show others how mad we are, or conjure up little chirping birdies around our heads to let people we’re dizzy, or develop little Xs for eyes when we’re dead? SlimShots, thou art so wise.
Can we also talk about what SlimShots actually are? These little packets of palm oil and oat oil look like mini creamers that you dump in your coffee. They claim to increase satiety, making you eat less between meals and at future meals. Bonus: They have a “a neutral smell and a slightly oaty taste.” So you can mix them in your yogurt or throw one back as you order your lunch at Cheesecake Factory without offending anyone’s nose.
But really, what would you do if you saw a woman shooting little creamer tubs? If you didn’t know they were SlimShots, you’d probably think she was trying to fatten herself up for some sort of competition; if you DID know they were SlimShots…well, what WOULD you think? “Oh, smart lady, drinking palm oil so she isn’t tempted by French fries!” Or, “Um, why not avoid looking like a drunk and just order a hearty salmon salad after 30 minutes on the treadmill?”
Anyone tried these puppies? Did they work?