Charlie Sheen Wants Mila Kunis to Be His Third "Goddess"

The actor tells fans on a "Violent Torpedo of Truth" tour stop that his girlfriends have "pre-approved" the Black Swan star

She's a black swan, he has tiger blood -- could it be a match? Charlie Sheen had declared that he would like Mila Kunis to become his third live-in girlfriend. And while he presumably hasn't approached the idea with the 27-year-old actress (whom we'd imagine isn't exactly ready to pack her bags), Sheen said during Wednesday night's "Violent Torpedo of Truth" live show in Columbus, Ohio, that he's already vetted the idea with his current girlfriends.

"Here's the good news -- my goddesses have already f***ing approved her, Sheen announced, referring to girlfriends Rachel Oberlin and Nataly Kenly. "She's pre-approved!"

Ooh, like a credit card. Bet she's super-flattered right now.

Sheen added that three women was really too many, and alluded to his recent allegation that Denise Richards stole his dogs. But, he said, he'd make an exception for the Black Swan star (who recently split with boyfriend Macaulay Culkin after eight years of dating).

"I would have great tolerance for many missing items provided it involves Mila f---ing Kunis," Sheen said. "Who wouldn't?"

And how would he go about enticing her to join his harem? "You know what I'm gonna do? I'm going to go on her Facebook page and discover her likes. I'm going to buy them all and then she can come steal them," he explained. "A super f---ing hot thief named Mila Kunis. 'Mila, please, we have a warehouse full of your favorite s--t for you to steal in Sherman Oaks.'" 

Passive-aggressively hitting on starlets is just one of the new additions to Sheen's retooled tour, which he'll be launching up and down the East Coast until through April 22. After bombing on opening night in Detroit, the actor reworked the show as a Q&A session, combining an onstage interview with questions from the audience. In preparation for his Radio City Music Hall performance on Friday, Sheen arrived in New York City today and checked into... the Trump Hotel. What, you thought the Plaza Hotel would have him back?
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