Chat with Dr. Brenda Shoshanna

Internos: I told him that -- he said the card was for me, that I would get it in "due time" and I shouldn't make him mad about it in the meantime. If you've never really had good communication, you certainly aren't going to have it in times of turmoil.
BrendaShoshanna: You are right. If you've never had good communication, it's hard to have it in time of turmoil -- almost impossible ... that's why it's so crucial to do it, in little steps and stages, all along. If you've suspected various affairs throughout the years and just let them slide, and continued to act as he wanted you to, it sounds as though you haven't been truthful to yourself. Rather, you've just been what he wanted you to be. Now you should get to know yourself, respect yourself, find out what's important to you and be the person you want to be.
Ellaskan: What are some rarely noticed signs that something is going wrong in a relationship? I think, perhaps, I may be missing something -- I seem to always feel things are going along fine, and when I find out they're not, it's traumatic. Not obvious signs, but signs most women wouldn't notice. Are there any? BrendaShoshanna: Many people find themselves shocked by the news that the relationship isn't working for the other person. The most important thing all along is ongoing communication between the two of you. Some signs that a relationship is not working are a man withdrawing, not calling or not being home when he says he will. These are signs that it is time to really sit down and talk (if you haven't already).

Connect with Us
Follow Our Pins

Yummy recipes, DIY projects, home decor, fashion and more curated by iVillage staffers.

Follow Our Tweets

The very dirty truth about fashion internships... DUN DUN @srslytheshow

On Instagram

Behind-the-scenes pics from iVillage.

Best of the Web