Cmtdarden: Welcome Dr Joan to our chat.
Dr Joan: I believe it is important to allow yourself to do whatever is possible (within personal respect) to keep a relationship moving forward. So, I believe in romance and sexual romance and in my book I discuss the difference between men and women. Men want sex, sex and more sex and then to be told how good they are. As women, we want romance. This can create a problem or we can learn to work with this wonderful difference.
Cmtdarden: Dr Joan, I agree with you there.
barkley211: I seem to have developed anxiety over giving oral sex to my partner. I want to please him, but I am concerned about my technique and I just figure that it is easier just to avoid oral sex all together.
Dr Joan: Please don't do that! Oral sex is so important to men. In my book, I talk about different ways to do oral sex. First, use your hand on the base of the penis and only allow a small part of the head of the penis in your mouth. Do what is comfortable for you. Tell him how beautiful his penis is and how much you love it and he will be happy. What else can I help you with?
barkley211: Do you have any specific tips on movements to use?
Dr Joan: Yes, with your hand, move up and down the penis, much harder than you would think is comfortable and lick and suck on the head of the penis. Next question please.
barkley211: Thanks. Dr. Joan. I will try it out.
shawnamarie99: My partner and I haven't had sex in two months, and he says that nothing is wrong. I don't know if it is me or what. I thought, as you said, that men love sex, sex, sex. But I am starting to have anxiety about even trying to start anything with him in fear of being rejected, and it is affecting my self-esteem.