'Dancing with the Stars' Recap: The 'Stars' Go Dancing

Here's the bonus about this new season: just from looking at the list of "celebrities," I can't tell you who is going to win. So that's an advantage over last season already. Whoa, Brooke's dress is like a purple version of J.Lo's famous Versace number. I hope she doesn't need to move around too much or the FCC is going to be all over that.

The couples are introduced and walk down the stairs for the first time this season. Margaret Cho is trying to do a funny fierce stomp down the stairs and she kind of trips and has a whole Lucy moment that cracks me up. I'm already sick of David Hasselhoff. Yes, I will hassle the Hoff, so don't tell me not to do it, you aging alcoholic poor excuse for a father. Oops, did my anger already slip out? Just you wait. There's more where that came from.

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