Daycare dilemma

My daughter is three-months-old. I work at home two days a week and her dad is home with her for two days. Since she was six-weeks-old she has spent the remaining day being cared for at a private home. All of a sudden, she started giving her provider a very difficult time about taking a bottle. Yesterday, she absolutely REFUSED. Once I nursed her, she was her happy little self. She accepts a bottle from her dad. Do you have any idea what might cause this sudden change?



Debbi Donovan

Debbi Donovan is a Board Certified Lactation Consultant, as well as a retired La Leche League Leader. For more than a decade, Debbi... Read more

Dear Carolyn,

When you have a child who isn't yet talking, it can be difficult to know if all is really going well in their day care situation. This is a concern for many moms who work outside the home. It does seem unusual to me that your daughter is taking bottles from your husband, but has abruptly begun to refuse bottles given by her sitter.

Just to be on the safe side, I would recommend stopping in, or having your husband stop in unannounced, and at odd times to see how everything is going. Even if your baby is not being poorly treated, she may be ignored, and I know that isn't how you want her to be cared for during your separation.

You also might want to try hiring another sitter for a day, or asking a friend or relative (that your baby isn't very familiar with) to substitute for one day. It's comparable to getting a second opinion. Does your baby take the bottle while in their care? How does her day go? Is she happy when you pick her up? This might give you insight into her current childcare arrangement.

While you're looking into the situation, you should talk to your sitter about offering Sierra your milk in a cup. This might work better than a bottle. Be sure your sitter knows how you want your daughter cared for in your absence. Tell her how you would like her to handle the situation if she continues to refuse the bottle, and how you would like to see her cared for when she cries. Role play a situation with her and see how she reacts. Follow your instincts!

Your daughter's sudden refusal of the bottle may have nothing to do with the care that she receives while at her sitter's, but I do believe it needs to be looked into. Hoping you are able to get figure out what is bothering your little one! Best wishes.


Need Advice?
Get answers from iVillage experts and other moms just like you!
Question Details
  1. Pick a subject:
Connect with 1,039,394 members just like you
Share your knowledge, ask questions.