Here are some ways to incorporate ritual into your lovemaking. Test a few and be sure to report your progress here [link to graffiti wall]. In honor of the new year, decide with your partner to engage in a ritual of acknowledging your love and attraction for each other. Exchange loving greeting cards. If you can afford it, send each other fresh flowers on the same day, preferably a day that you have set aside for just the two of you (even if that means merely one undisturbed hour after the kids have been put to bed, if that's the most you can arrange for now). Once they arrive, choose a specific time to perform your ritual: Take one flower from each of your bouquets and place them together on stand or table. You will be creating a "love shrine," with the flowers cards you have sent each other and a large white candle. Each of you then says aloud, "This flower is the symbol of my growing love for you." Together, light the white candle, make eye contact and say in unison, "This flame is the symbol of the rekindling of our love and attraction for each other." After you are finished with this ritual, do whatever feels natural! But don't forget to share a hug.