Kristina Grish, the author of Boy Vey! The Shiksa's Guide to Dating Jewish Men, makes the claim that Jewish guys are the new hotties. She tells you why these men make the best dates, where you can snag a hot mensch and how to get in with a Member of the Tribe. Are her claims over the top? You decide.
The First Shtup
Maybe it's how the moonlight shines on your boyfriend's freckled cheeks, or the way his big green eyes lock with yours after trading inside jokes. You wonder how his exfoliated skin will feel against your naked belly ‑- and that's when your hormones decide to give in to chemistry and curiosity. Tonight's the night.
Before christening your guy's 600-thread-count sheets, mentally brace yourself for a passionate performance by a man whose heritage insists his primary goal is to please his lover. Since his attention will always work to your libido's benefit, wondering whether your pleasure is a means to his end should never be an issue. Not when sharing an open, sexual experience together is a mutual priority. But there are a few things to consider when feeling frisky...
Follow these bedroom crib notes to one sexy shtup.
Stereotypes, Schmereotypes: The Saucy Shiksa
Throughout Jewish history, Shiksas have borne the brunt of an undoubtedly seductive and unfairly whorish reputation. The drama! We're thought to be sirens and gold diggers, femme fatales who use our aggressive wiles to capture the hearts and wallets of Jewish men ‑- and deliberately weaken their family line and sexual resolve. In fact, our insidiously carnal, promiscuous, immoral and insensitive instincts are said to be notoriously and undeniably irresistible.
To that I say: Meow.
Flattered? Insulted? Be aware of the above, but please don't take it personally. Here's why: Though playing the role of a bad, bad Shiksa makes for kinky bedtime banter, the truth is that most young, educated Jewish men who date outside their faith don't believe the saucy stereotype to be a modern reality. (It's actually your boyfriend's parents and grandparents you have to worry about. They're the most fearful that the Jewish race will vanish from the earth ‑- and that wanton goyim lead the way.) What your boyfriend and his contemporaries do welcome, however, is everything your unique look, life and social perspectives introduce to his world ‑- which inevitably includes his bedroom. Ryan, a political activist from Philadelphia, couldn't agree more. "The fun for me is the clashing of the two worlds," he says. "For example, I would never ask a woman to take off her cross or St. Christopher pendant when we're together. I wouldn't want her to lose her self in the fear of difference." Sandor Gardos, PhD, a Jewish sex therapist and CEO of the San Francisco-based Web site www.mypleasure.com, insists that it's the loss of novelty that kills passion. "If you're both raised on the same kibbutz and share all the same values, it could get old," he says, adding in half-jest: "Plus, if a man's in bed with another Jew who makes the same nasal sounds his Mom or cousins make, it's not that sexy. A relationship may last longer and your sex life stay hotter if you're from different cultural, religious or racial backgrounds." Keith, a clinical researcher from Philadelphia who exclusively dates gentiles, is on that bandwagon. "Most of the Jewish girls I've known have similar values, desires and humor. Dating an unpredictable Shiksa increases mystery, a quality all men find attractive in women."