Everything You Want to Know about Orgasms

  • Try the "bridge technique." If you don't fancy using a vibrator, this is the technique most sex therapists recommend. The basic idea is to give you clitoral stimulation up to the point of, but not actually to, orgasm. Then you let his thrusting trigger the orgasmic reflex. This effectively provides a "bridge" between clitoral stimulation and intercourse. In other words, he stimulates the clitoris right up to penetration, then thrusting takes over as the primary stimulation.

  • Choose your position carefully. Woman on top or him from behind are the most likely positions to stimulate the front vaginal wall and up your chances of orgasm. Some men say her-on-top makes it easier for them to control ejaculation; others say that glorious view has the opposite effect (men are visual creatures after all). So pick a position that's most likely to tip you over the edge and pray it's one that has the opposite effect on him.

  • Try everything all at once! Pick a position that hits the front wall of the vagina. Then one of you works on your clitoris with a wand vibrator as he penetrates and bites your neck, talks dirty or does whatever your personal orgasm trigger might be.

  • Pull on his testicles. If you think he's too close to climaxing and you're not ready yet, pull down on his testicles gently to decrease his chances of orgasm. Or push his penis downward, holding onto the base. (This works a treat on some men; others find it uncomfortable.)
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