You Act like a Crazy Person
To avoid coming across like that woman who thinks she's being charismatic when she's merely speaking way too loud and annoying everyone around her, when in doubt, keep your little "eccentricities" in check. Because while your dramatic emotional life may be just that, it can read to men as nuts. As one of our friends says elegantly, "Sexiness is balance. Nothing is a bigger turnoff to me than a woman who seems unstable. That's not exciting. That's exhausting and boring." Another friend agrees. "I'm not saying I want a woman who is emotionless," he explains, "but falling apart constantly just gets tiresome. Eventually, all men see it as a pointless cry for attention or a passive-aggressive play for leverage." And either one ain't good.
You Confuse Flirting with Fighting
Remember the part about playing nicely with others? Well, we're gonna circle back to that for a minute, because another thing we hear all the time is women deciding that picking a playful fight with a guy is a way of showing him she's interested. It's not. "It drives me totally nuts to watch a woman think that she's being witty when she's just being argumentative," moans one guy who's happily found his match. "I love a witty woman — my fiancée can talk circles around me when she gets going — but I hate a woman who picks arguments that are not enlightening or entertaining, just exhausting." And we can't believe we actually have to say this, but our friends have asked us to, since we have the chance: No hitting. Not flirtatiously. Not playfully. Not for nothing. "That drives me crazy!" one guy says. "It's this automatic go-to for a lot of women, where they get overexcited with some hormonal rush or something and she punches me in the arm to make a point. No, no, no. I'm not a sparring partner."