New to boards and need to vent re: mood swings, etc
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|Mon, 09-03-2012 - 8:54am|
Hello ladies! I'm 51 and period free for 2 years now. It went quietly thank goodness, for that I am grateful, however, my mind is NEVER quiet and my heart always feels in turmoil. Granted, my life isn't easy, but I'm lucky compared to alot of people.
The slightest thing can set me into a tailspin of sadness or anger. It seems to comes in waves, I'll have a week or two where I feel peaceful and happy with my life, then the "dark cloud" decends and I'm in a funk for a week or more for no real reason.
I have a good man in my life, but he can look at me wrong and it sets me off thinking I've made the wrong decision; "what's he doing, can I trust him, does he really love me????" all these irrational thoughts enter my mind and I can't let go! I worry about EVERYTHING!! I have a 20 yr old son that lives with his father an hour away who has some issues (both of them) and I dwell on them for days at a time. I have a job in the public eye that requires all my mental faculties, and always a positive attitude and sometimes I just can't bring it.
Please don't suggest antidepressants!! I have been that route and refuse to go back, my sister committed suicide 8yrs ago after being switched from one antid to another. I also hate the feeling of emotional flatness they give you and have worked so hard to be drug-free. I take only meds necessary for migraine and some kidney problems, as well as 1 or 2 tramadol for fibro. I don't drink either.
I guess I just needed to let this out, to see if there are toher ladies who go through this cycle. I feel like I'm going absolutely crazy and want to feel like I'm not alone on this journey.
Thanks for your time, and I hope I make some new friends here!