I finally went to an Al Anon meeting!!!!
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|Tue, 01-28-2014 - 9:09pm|
And if you have never been I suggest you go! I was scared out of my mind!! I just keep thinking put your big girl panties on and just do it!! I wanted to run out 20 times but I did not! I kept telling myself that I was there for a reason and although I am not happy that my DH has put in the position to where I HAVE to be here I am going to just try!!
It was so odd...I did feel like we just sat around and read all those things you were suppose to read ....I did open up and it was a nice release and let a secret out! One of the ladies said hey here is a book you can buy...I bought it! That was the best money I have ever spent!! I have read 1/4 of it and have decided to read a few pages a day so I can learn what it is saying and not just ram into my mind!
The book has taught me that all the thoughts I have ever had ...all the bad ones all the dark ones are actually what ever one else has. Made me feel so much better because I was worried about my own sanity!
I am learning not to listen to beer openings one right after the other...I am also learning come what may! I have no say! No matter how much I preach about health...it's his health not mine! All I need to worry about is my health and my kids!
I will ask you this...when DH gets drunk I tell the kids leave dad alone he is drunk or if the kids ask me a question I am honest with them. One time my husband said not to do that and I told him they have the right to know for many reasons. And I have no intentions on covering up his secrets with them. It stinks and I hate that my kids see this but this is their path for whatever reason...God has a reason for it...I feel like it's my job to explain what is going on...maybe it will prevent them from making bad choices and it is also to keep them safe.
I plan to attend another meeting...I felt so good after the first one I want to go back! I may go in scared but I come out feeling ALIVE!