Is my husband an alcoholic?

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2008
Is my husband an alcoholic?
8
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 9:28am

I posted on another board about my recent horrifying discovery. I never knew my husband drank until I got a call in the middle of the night from a friend of his that he was in the ER. He had drank so much that he was unconscious. They kept him for 24 hours then he came home. It's been a rough week around here as I don't know what to even say about it. HE says he has quit and I hope so. He had been getting help for depression and was going through some personality changes. I had no idea he was behaving so crazy because of the booze. I thought it was his mental illness. He said he's been drinking a bottle of vodka that looks to be about the size of a half gallon every 4-5 days. Does that mean he is an alcoholic? Is it possible for him to just quit like that? I think he needs to talk to his doctor about all this but he won't. He says it's over now and he wants to move on. I am so stressed.

Brenda

iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:55pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:55pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:55pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:55pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:55pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-13-2005
Wed, 03-26-2014 - 6:56pm
I'm really sorry to hear about your husband's trip to the ER--I hope he's okay. Is he being treated for his mental illness with meds? I am asking because I was going to post almost the same exact thing you just did in regards to my husband. My husband is an unmedicated bipolar sufferer and he drinks to self-medicate. Lately, he's been downing almost 7 or 8 beers a night, but he still appears fairly functional on the outside. If your husband's drinking that much vodka, I'd say that yes, he's probably at least very dependent on it if not a fullblown alcoholic. I think if he won't talk to his doctor about it, he should at least go to an AA meeting or talk with a therapist who can help him understand it's a problem. Good luck to you. I know it's hard.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-22-2013
Thu, 03-27-2014 - 3:53pm
Brenda, I'm not surprised this is stressing you out. Your husband could have died from alcohol poisoning and most definitely needs to be examined by a doctor. This is a serious scare and wake-up call. It's hard to say what the interaction is with medication and alcohol, but I'm not sure it's possible for him to quit cold turkey after consuming that sort of quantity over a period of weeks. Even if he's not willing to get help, you can attend Al-Anon meetings and learn what you can do to help. Check locally for chapters and don't be embarrassed about going. I wish you all the best, friend.
Community Leader
Registered: 10-08-2002
Wed, 04-16-2014 - 1:06pm
Brenda, this is very distressing for you I am sure. I do not know how long he has been drinking that much, but it definately a warning sign of something. Is he an alcoholic? I dont know. Neither does anyone else, He is the only one that knows if he can stop on his own power or not....but that amount of drinking is definately not healthy for him. Alcohol does damage. He will have to talk to his doctor. Is he able to not drink and not have any withdrawal symptoms? He might not be at the physical symptom place yet....I am a big advocate of AlAnon. These good folks can and will show you how you can live with this type of dysfunction going on. Keep talking to someone. Dont bottle up your anger or be quiet because you are ashamed of what he is doing.....Get the help you need because you might need more help later if he does not stop drinking. God bless honey....you and all those other great friends, mates, and co-workers that love the drunks when the drunks cant love themselves...
Alcohol, Addictions & Recovery. It's a long way down, but only 12 steps UP