Really need a new sponsor, just not coping
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| Sun, 10-09-2011 - 8:20am |
Maybe I need a board of directors. I nominate all of you!
For those who have just come to the board, or for you who don't remember, I am married to a recovering alcoholic who was married before we met. Actually he was divorced before we met also. ANYWAY.....I have an estranged stepson. He was not in contact with us from March 2003 to this past February when his grandfather (my husband's dad) died. After that he would text once a month, maybe a little more. My dad died in July, and stepson did come to the hospital and to the funeral. Since then he has texted me many times, usually once a month.
He wants me to go meet his family (a 7 year old girl and brand new baby boy). Me, not his father. Says he is not ready for that. My husband says I should, that it is a first step to healing our family.
You know what, I am not sure I want that. I am not sure I want the chaos that comes with the boy's mother being on the periphery of our family. I am already teaching for the next two years one of her other grandchildren. (long story, I will elaborate if you wish). When she saw me at open house (she is the boy's mom's only transportation) she said "What is that f***ing b***h doing here?"
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I decided that I am not going to make a decision until after the first of the year. My daughters, husband, MIL, and I deserve all my attention through this very difficult first holiday season without the grandpas.
I also am leaning toward my original decision...we are all or nothing. I will take his texts and answer them. I will not originate texts to him. He needs to make up his mind. It didn't help that, despite knowing about it, he didn't bother to text or call his sister on her 16th birthday.