It's been a long journey.
Ahhhh....the world of the spouse/significant other/loved one...we alcoholics are obnoxious when we drink and sometimes even more so when we first stop drinking. Remember that not drinking means we are dry...sober takes a lot longer!!! The reason why people need programs or therapy or education or religion when they stop drinking is not just to stop, but also to change our behavior. It takes time.
You have every right to your distrust, anger, fear and exasperation. Having said that, I also know that if you hold on to those feelings, you are the one hurting yourself. So, what do you do? Well, for one, you come here and vent. Second, you might want to check out AlAnon- hard to do when you have little ones, especially with one with special needs. Fortunately, AlAnon is online (although being able to get out to meetings would be great for you also). Therapy is another choice--if you can get to one.
You might want to check out these passages from the book Alcoholics Anonymous so that you can see you are not alone with how you feel. http://www.aa.org/bigbookonline/en_bigbook_chapt8.pdf
Thanks for the feedback.
I read a great line from a book today when I was at the store trying to find a self-help book.
Your plight sounds so familiar...I feel pretty hopeless myself these days.
I'm giving him a year to get his $h!t together.
Try this link: http://www.al-anon.alateen.org/meetings/meeting.html
Or try your local phone book. AlAnon might have its own number, or the AA hotline might know.