I have to admit it ...

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-07-2006
I have to admit it ...
4
Mon, 06-06-2011 - 11:36am

I was married VERY young to my husband. There really was NO WAY I could have known in our teens that he would turn into an alcoholic. Some guys grow out of the drinking and partying phase - and in his case, he just never did. We were married for over 15 years - and I look back now and see that he was an alcoholic from the day I met him. He just always had those tendencies, and that DESIRE. Alcohol was always very important to him. And at the time ... I was experimenting. And not just with alcohol! The thing is that I grew out of it. I wanted to clean up and be responsible and he didn't.

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Tue, 06-07-2011 - 8:58am

...good for you!!!!....we do have choices (drunks included...and, that is just my opinion...not stating it as fact...just my opinion)...and, the choices we make have consequences...being married to a drunk must be difficult...at the beginning of relationships, we have a tendency to gloss over the negative and acentuate the positive (we are chemically driven by our hormones to do this...we have a biological need to bond)...unfortunately, sometimes, some of us find ourselves bound to a substance abuser...add in children and social norms/family expectations and we feel stuck...a most impowering thought process is to own our choices...if we choose to continue to drink without seeking help or we continue to stay in a relationship with someone that abuses a substance, those are choices...and, we made them...so, we have to own the consequences...

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-21-2007
Wed, 07-06-2011 - 8:43pm

I should have set boundries, I wish I had and wasn't blind like I was--probably

iVillage Member
Registered: 02-03-2009
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 7:59am

...so, did he drive to get the bottle himself?

Community Leader
Registered: 09-14-1997
Thu, 07-07-2011 - 8:28am

Great post