Already being asked: what are you doing for the holidays?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Already being asked: what are you doing for the holidays?
Tue, 11-08-2011 - 3:11pm

I hate that question.


iVillage Member
Registered: 12-29-2010
Yes but it just feels like they feel duty bound to ask and dont really care. So even though I dont know, I wont tell them that.
Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001


Do whatever you would like to do...:)

I think staying home with the puppy sounds positively divine.

One year ds and I had spaghetti.

It was wonderful!

Actually it was accidental because my dd and her SO had forgotten to defrost it so we celebrated a little bit later.

Over the years we have done things differently.

Last year ds and I had turkey and dd was invited but stayed home which was ojay/fine.

No one needs/wants guilt.

Do what majes you happy...whether it's being ALONE helping out at a Community Christmas celebration.

There is no right or wrong way to celebrate.

I do miss sometimes when my kids were little but we set new traditions or routines.

This Christmas it will be twenty-one years since losing my beloved Mom.

I still miss her.

My dd has a birthday and growing up my kids never felt the Sadness because usually Bocxing Day was my day.

Usually they went with my ex their dad that day.

I allowed myself to grieve and reflect on that day.

I am so happy my dd is getting out of the hospital.

Not too sure what our plans are.

She has a new b/f and I assume they might like to spend it together, their first Christmas...don't know yet.

I like flexibility.

This year I am staying home hanging out with ds and if dd would like she is more than welcome to come over.

In spite of losing my mom and her dad my grand=pa at Christmas I have tried to make it Special.

I feel I am honouring her.

Sounds lovely what you are thinking of doing.

Maybe next year things might be different but it still up to you to do what would make you the most comfortable.

Pizza, mac and cheese, grilled cheese and bacon ALL sound great!

I know last year was fun, ds and I cooked our turkey overnight and had it in the early afternoon.

Always give my kids a stocking, one year I used pillow we also treat our cats.

Abig mug of hot chocolate lots of Christmas movies or music.

Enjoy the day your way!



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Then afterwards I get to hear: how was your holiday? what did you do? Yep, wake me up when it is January. Josie
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999

Thanks Lorie. I am just glad your daughter is getting out of the hospital, what a blessing. I am really leaning toward me and puppy and no other humans on the day. I am sure missing hubby at the moment, will eat and exercise and shower and do my daily Christian reading. I know God is love, but He knew my husband was my family, no other birth family within hours and puppy isn't invited to their houses. So sure, I could drive 2 hrs by myself while having her in kennel, but like NOT. Love me, love my puppy! hugs, Josie

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009

I hate that as well Josie.

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001

My ds has "Anxiety" so large get togethers are not for him nor for me either.

Large to him could mean one or two more people.

I like being with him and our two cats on that day.

Sometimes people have suggested or expected I leave him ALONE my ds.

Not happening.

I am with you!

So glad she will be getting out soon.

I am happy for her.

When I was little we ALWAYS went to my grand-parents for Christmas usually.

I hated it honestly.

Too many people, not in my own home and my "Abuser" would be there.

I wanted my kids to be at home.

So Christmas Eve and Christmas Day that's where we were.

The could stay in their pj's play and not have to go anywhere.

It was nice.

We were a family like you and hubby.

I miss my beloved who committed suicide and it's been nine years.

The first year was hard.

My kids were close to him.

My dd and him were very close as was my ds.

He had mental health issues but got the kids kwim?

Both my dd and him were Artists and my ds and him were into technology.

It's a Loss you just don't get over.

I hate it when people say that.

When people ask me I turn the tables and ask what they are doing?

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009

Turning the tables on the askers is a good move Lori.

Community Leader
Registered: 09-14-1997

Not being asked. When my sister died, I was told by my cousins that I would join their clan with my girls on Christmas. That still stands. They lost their dad, so they know loss too.

Josie, what kind of puppy?

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001


iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
HI Beth. Rudi is a tweenie dachshund, I was told she was a mini, but the one book said over 11# is a tweenie, 16# is a standard and she is 13.8 so I call her my tweenie wienie. Mainly black with tan highlights. She was born Jan 24th and I adopted her March 18th. I never had any type of pet before, but house was so empty without hubby and after I retired I had lots of free time. Really rough starting out with potty training and crate training but we are so much better, still have some room for improvement but hey, I am a work in progress also. I took her into my old work yesterday and showed her off. love, Josie