Feeling so OLD

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Feeling so OLD
7
Sun, 04-15-2012 - 8:03am

I was 54 when I was widowed, now am 56.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Sun, 04-15-2012 - 8:41am

Hi Josie;

I feel your pain but not in the same way so I apologize because no one knows the pain of the death of a spouse. I guess I can relate to you what you are going through.. I am 58 and I feel like life is over in alot of ways.. At these ages I think if someone has no spouse, bfriend or purpose it feels like a done deal.. It feels like that to me also... I am divorced with no job and limited friends and I was doing some dating but like you I do not like it..I havent been on

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Sun, 04-15-2012 - 4:55pm

Thanks for your comments.

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-02-2008
Sun, 04-15-2012 - 5:28pm

Hi Josie

Well It sounds like you have a full plate and you are atleast trying.. That is a very good sign .. Sometimes I give up and then I am out here in life again.. Its such a vicious cycle that I cant stand it some days..

I often wonder though why do bad things happen to good people.. I read a book about that once and still was confused.. Some days I am so lonely and it hurts bad and I ask God why?? I say God why dont you bring a good man into my life.. I feel as if some days he does not answer or he has more important things to do.. Its so depressing to be alone and that is good you have puppy.. I have family and friends and people would be jealous of my life because they have no one.

why is it that we always want what we dont have but have what we need .... That part never makes sense to me but then again life makes no sense to me on a good day (lol)

Anyway; I have a small pension and savings also and I live with family so its relatively affordable.. (maybe).. I would just like to find something part time for extra money and find a place of my own. Its time I guess to branch out and find my own place but so many places are disgusting and yucky... but I keep looking.. Right now I live in house by the beach. Its my sisters house but its in a very nice area and I am greatful for that..

WEll;

Thanks Josie and take care of you and Puppy

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Mon, 04-16-2012 - 6:15am

I loved my husband so much and had so many plans to get old together, and all those years of working at a very stressful job, always thought retirement would be the 2 of us traveling and just hanging out together.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009
Mon, 04-16-2012 - 12:59pm

Hey,

I am so sorry I have not replied earlier but I have been sick..again:smileysad:

It can be real hard to fit in with people when they are not in your age group as we all have differing expectations. No matter how kind a group is, if you don't feel totally at ease with it, it can be not as helpful we'd like.

I also think you are still very early on in your grieving. Two years is a real short time in the healing journey so you are still coping with that.



iVillage Member
Registered: 11-04-1999
Fri, 04-20-2012 - 5:39am

Hi Promise, sorry you were sick, I hope you are feeling better.

I quit a prayer group in which the leader kept giving me insensitive remarks and I had had enough of it.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2009
Sun, 04-22-2012 - 10:53am

Hey Josie,

still sick but feeling a bit better today.

I find people are very good at saying what we "should" be doing grievingwise but unless you are insomeone's life, you don't don't know what they are going through or have gone through. These things in our lives can have a major effect on us and this is reflected in how we deal with things.

That's a good