ongoing pain

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2012
ongoing pain
13
Tue, 03-05-2013 - 9:09am

Hello everyone,

Its been awhile since I was on here, been a bit down.  I stll feel such pain for my buddy Sue, I miss her all the time and our talks, I would do anything to talk to her one last ime, but I know its nots possible.  My brother who also has cancer is not so good, see him going down and down, its all so overwhelming at times.  Both these people were such anchors in my  life.  To top it off my husband could not be less sensitive or caring, its like his life has not been interupted so its not his problem, I am to the point, with his cold heartness, I think I need to leave, he could not be less supportive and its actually making things so much worse for me.  You sure find out who you true friends are in times of trouble........

 

I hope you feel better Promise, we do miss you

 

Hugs to all

Kathy

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iVillage Member
Registered: 08-18-2012
In reply to: okeakc01
Tue, 03-05-2013 - 11:45am

Thank you Brenda, Yes I do understand the concept of people grieving differently, and coping techniques, You are right he is the type of person that hides his head in the sand, and hopes it all goes away, unfortunately this process of grief is a long journey, if it ever ends.  My friend died just over 7 months ago, someone I considered a sister, we knew each other for ever, the void is huge.  Now My brother, is basically dying as well, with stage 4 colorectal cancer and I am his primary care giver, I watch him decline everyday.  So the stress is overwelming at times, I am not the same person, my husband is great for the no emotional type things, driving places, doing errands, that sort of thing, he sucks for emotionally support, and that is what I need right now more than anything.  I have went to grief councilling and private councilling, it does help to a degree, but the work processing this all is up to me, and its difficult. 

Hugs

Kathy 

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
In reply to: okeakc01
Tue, 03-05-2013 - 9:27am

~hugs~

Hi Kathy,

Lorie here just wanted to let you know you are not ALONE I am here my friend...:)...

<3

Nightangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 06-25-2008
In reply to: okeakc01
Tue, 03-05-2013 - 9:19am

Hi Kathy,

People show grief in odd ways and maybe your husband's cold heartedness is his way of coping with your losses. Perhaps he is one of those type people that tend to just ignore things in the hopes it will go away. Have you talked to him about how you feel?

Also, Have you thought about getting some counseling for yourself? It may help to talk to someone.

Brenda

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