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|Wed, 01-04-2012 - 8:54am|
Last year I suffered two miscarriages, one at 5 weeks and one at 9 weeks. After the second one, my husband and I decided that we will wait at least 6 months or maybe a year to go travelling and get ourselves mentally ready to try again. However, lately I have been thinking that maybe we should not wait but I am so scared to try because what if it happens again. I have been having very strange dreams about being pregnant and about babies that are pregnant. (have no idea why I would dream about a baby being pregnant, it creeped me out)
I am sure it is all because during day I am thinking about it as we have some friends that had babies recently and I almost break down every time I see them. Last time we were in a restaurant and one of my friends was playing with his daughter of 11 months and I felt like someone stabbed in the heart. All I can think about is how it would be wonderful for my husband to be able to play with his own child like that. My husband is open to trying again soon as well but we are both so scared that we just can't bring ourselves to do it. So I guess it would be better that we wait as we are clearly not ready. I just don't know what to do.
Are there any tests that I can do to see why this has happened? We are even willing to go private and pay for the tests as the doctors here won't do anything until the third time. I am not sure I can handle a third time. What do I do? I am so lost.
Thanks for reading.