Find a Conversation
|Fri, 01-18-2013 - 12:47am|
I'm not sure who is out there, I just happened upon this forum. I'm 25 years old, and I just completed the second step of a medication abortion yesterday. My relatively long term boyfriend was very supportive of whatever choice I made, but both of us agreed that given our ages and the fact that he is still a law student, and I have only been out of college and working for ~3 years, abortion was the logical choice. He has been my rock, and has supported me (sometimes literally) through each step of this painful and sometimes embarrassing process. However, I still wish I could have had this child, our child, with the first man I ever thought I might want to have a child with. I find myself getting angry at him for being unaffected, and sometimes, although I know this was the responsible choice, I irrationally blame him for always speaking out in support of making the sensible choice. I keep thinking that I may have made a mistake, that we could have had this child (we are adults after all, and he will be working by July), and that we should have found a way to make this work.
In short I am surprised at how deeply I feel this loss, and at how shaken up I am. I don't want to lose my wonderful boyfriend over this, but I can't seem to stop feeling upset at him over this, even though I know its not his fault and he did everything he could to help me through this diffficult process.
If anyone has any advice, I could really use some right now.