Rethinking Self-Blame
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Rethinking Self-Blame
| Mon, 12-12-2011 - 10:58am |
For a long time I took a large piece of responsiblity for having been raped.
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Yes. I agree with what that person told you. It's all about him-not you. It wasn't your fault.
Zoe
Community Leader - Sexual Abuse Healing
Boards> Health & Fitness >Crisis Support >Sexual Abuse Healing
http://www.ivillage.com/forums/health-fitness/crisis-support/sexual-abuse-healing
I understand the self-blame. Yet when you step back and look at other rape victims, do you blame them? It's so easy for us to blame ourselves, yet to tell any other victim that she/he was not to blame. Sometimes it takes that stepping back and putting someone else in your position and knowing you'd never blame that person, and then you can slowly--ever so slowly--begin to realize you were not to blame either. I don't care what someone was wearing, doing, drinking, the company they were in, or any of that--no person has the right under any circumstances to violate another person. The rapist is always the one in the wrong. You are innocent ((((Zoe)))) and did nothing wrong.
Allie
Yes Zoe. I too hold myself responsible.
I was a victim of childhood abuse by a relative. I never told anyone until I got older. He was killed in a car wreck and I was so happy. Everyone else was grief stricken but not me. I struggle with guilt over it.
It can be difficult when a perpetrator dies and you might experience some type of relief when others aren't experiencing that same sense of relief.
Zoe
Community Leader - Sexual Abuse Healing
Boards> Health & Fitness >Crisis Support >Sexual Abuse Healing
http://www.ivillage.com/forums/health-fitness/crisis-support/sexual-abuse-healing
Yes it is easy to tell others but often hard when it comes to me.
Zoe
Community Leader - Sexual Abuse Healing
Boards> Health & Fitness >Crisis Support >Sexual Abuse Healing
http://www.ivillage.com/forums/health-fitness/crisis-support/sexual-abuse-healing