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|Tue, 07-02-2013 - 6:20pm|
today I told my best friend something and it wasnt anything huge. I went off my meds that is all and she went off on me and told me to grow the F up and then she called my DH, in the past when I have gone off my meds I have become suicidal and I understand her concern but to tell me to grow the F up and yell at me, and for another I am not suicidal at all, I have lost all trust in her I have asked her in the past not to text or call my hubby unless I become suicidal and she agreed but she broke the agreement. I am devastated cause I dont want to lose her as my best friend cause she and means more to me then just a best friend she has become a part of my family, she said very hurtful things, I can forgive and will but I dont forget and I will always remember what she said to me. I now have no one that I can truely talk to and maybe that is a good thing you know maybe I trust and talk too much. I am for now on just going to be a yes mam kind of person and keep my feelings hidden and just be fake that way no one can hurt me or betray my trust ever again. I cant stop crying I hate myself for begging her not to hate me.