calm before the storm Monday

Community Leader
Registered: 09-25-2003
calm before the storm Monday
8
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 8:21am

I spent most of the weekend putting more than a ream of documentation together for the new lawyer that I may be hiring tomorrow.  <sigh>  I am in the midst of extreme anxiety as I am scared of the legal system, where a judge who knows nothing about me and the history of my first marriage makes decisions that have a SIGNIFICANT impact on my life.  I saw a fb post recently that said something to the point of, "The best resolution of conflict is to walk directly THROUGH it," but that is what causes me great anxiety.  :(  C'est la vie.  So, I cut more checks tomorrow...my ex is asking for more child support (he is desperate because it all ends in July) and I have to pay the retainer for the new lawyer...it's only money, yes?!  I have court tomorrow since my current lawyer is resigning from my case for some unknown reason that she won't communicate to me.  I am hopeful that the judge will give me an extension on my 4/10 court date, as I have no lawyer to represent me at this time.  :(

I did two advanced yoga classes this weekend, and my quads are letting me know I am alive.  I hope to go dancing at least once this week, if not twice...we shall see how I feel.  Today is my rest day.

My new journal consists of three new things each day that I am grateful for...1.  the beautiful view from my sunroom each morning, 2.  my dogs that calm me, 3. nature outside my window that bring me a peaceful feeling.  :D  Make it a great day, everyone!

Avatar for elc11
Community Leader
Registered: 06-16-1998
Tue, 04-01-2014 - 12:33pm

De-lurking to comment on a few things: my dh has been wearing those Hokas for a couple of months and really likes them. I call them his marshmallow shoes! They've made a big difference with back pain, having his heel slightly elevated. He wears his orthotics in them. They are worth the extra cost because of fewer visits to the chiropractor.

Karla, what that doctor said to your DIL is inexcusable whether even if he meant it as a joke. When things calm down I hope that she will report it to the hospital. They need to be aware of these things and that pediatrician needs "sensitivity training". They should also know that their handling of the headache could have been catasrophic. When in doubt the ER should contact the specialist. (do they use electronic medical records there?) Hopefully the neurosurgeon will advocate for her on that one. Okay, off my soapbox.

Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Tue, 04-01-2014 - 11:16am

SJ, I don't have high opinions about lawyers. They all play a game with laws and rules (and people's lives). Some are well connected and can cheat real good and others are barely hanging on hoping they'll get the ball or role doubles some day.  

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Tue, 04-01-2014 - 11:13am

Gym, those shoes look very interesting. Does it feel like you are walking on a platform? The sole looks really thick. I like a good cushion but too much actually makes my feet hurt because it puts too much bend in my plantar tendon. 

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 9:19pm
Karla, it is inexcusable that the pediatrician criticized your daughter in law. Those are behaviors that lead to lawsuits...but then you would be in FSN's boat...trying to find a good lawyer. Sometimes it amazes me that the world works at all. GR, I think we all who we are because of our mothers...the things we do and the things we don't do. My mother probably had an anxiety disorder...we almost never went anywhere without going home to make sure the iron was unplugged and the stove was off...I NEVER iron...but I do check that the stove is off.,,but mostly, when I realize I am worrying about something stupid, I make myself not act on it. On the other hand, I am a perfectionist about some things, and that is all her...some of this drives me to do a good job, part just annoying...I guess you take the good with the bad. I only made it until 3:30 at work today....the good thing is I was able to go to Pilates for the first time in months. My lifting schedule is messed up this week because of my schedule and my trainers...i hope we manage three sessions but if we can't I have to just goo with it. I ran one mile in 14 minutes exactly. I am going to try to run a mile each time I go to the gym this week.
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 10:53am

Awww... thanks FSN.  Actually last week, OP noted that he thought my codependence comes from dealing with my mom.  The interesting piece of that is that she is VERY codependent too but it volleys between that and inexcusable narcissism.  I don't know that I handled things with as much grace as I would have liked but  I suppose I did my best.  

Totally non-related gymratty thing - my remaining PT client turned me onto a new brand of shoes.  They're called Hoka and the model I got is the One-One.  They are super springy and cushiony.  I've realized recently that my orthotics make my feel hurt.  So, I'm wearing these without the orthotics for a while to see what happens.  They are rather spendy so if you decide you want them, get from from 6pm.com  Much cheaper.  

Community Leader
Registered: 09-25-2003
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 9:25am

Karla, how horrible, but how wonderful that the neurosurgeon was able to take care of things correctly.  I really  hope that someone tells off the pediatrician!  What a jerk!  And you are AWESOME with your runs!

GR, perhaps your mother's behavior is why you are so considerate and sensitive to others.  From something annoying comes something (someone) so nice!  It is wonderful that you can be the "adult" in the situation.  Now, I will have to use your stories as my inspiration as I deal with my mother.

iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 9:16am

FSN, I'm so sorry you've had so much trouble with lawyers.  I just can't imagine dropping a client like that for no explained reason. My hope is that you find someone who is competent and understanding so that you can relax and not have to be a lawyer on top of everything else.  

Karla, how stressful for your family!  And agreed...  thank goodness for assertive moms.  How's the baby doing this morning?  Congrats on your runs!  

It was a good but tiring weekend.  I have more or less recovered from my mom's visit.  Upon returning home, she wrote me a lovely thank you note thanking me for my hospitality.  It was a nice gesture but still boggles the mind...  how does an adult not know she's behaving like a brat!?!?!  The fundraiser went well on Saturday.  It was a smaller turnout than we were hoping for but the donation per person average was quite impressive.  

I've got a busy day.  Several resumes to work on this morning/afternoon plus a phone consultation.  Also, my PT client wanted to train earlier so due to my schedule, she's coming to my house this morning.  Planning to get in some type of strength workout this afternoon.  

Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Mon, 03-31-2014 - 8:42am

Fresh, what a nightmare with the lawyers. Imagine if you were depending on the "system" for your life?!

It's been a very scary weekend for my family. My granddaughter has not been feeling or acting well for days so when she started to complain she had a headache her mom took her to the hospital. They ran some tests and sent her home on Saturday. There was even a smart alec pediatrician at the hospital who told daughter-in-law if she would feed granddaughter better she might not have headaches (gd is very small and thin). Sunday the headaches got worse and her feet and legs got stiff and turned in so mommy called the neurosurgeon and they told her to get to the hospital asap. As it turned out, granddaughter's brain shunt had malfunctioned and she had to have emergency brain surgery late last night. They told my son and his wife had they waited any longer to get treatment she could have been a vegtable by this morning. Thank GOD my daughter-in-law is very observant and pushy when it comes to her daughter's health. 

Yesterday was a gloriously beautiful day (before all the brain surgery drama) so my sister and I set out to do a long run. We did 8.5 miles on a very hilly course. I felt so empowered by my run. I may be up to a double digit long run in a few more weeks. :-)

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING