welcome back J Thursday

Community Leader
Registered: 09-25-2003
welcome back J Thursday
14
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 7:21am

Phew, yesterday was a whirlwind, starting with an early morning meeting that took 90 minutes to drive to, work all day, a lawyer-interview-phone-call at the end of the day, an emotional breakdown with dh over the legal issues (this legal stuff keeps making me second guess my past decisions), and, then, linedancing all evening.  Today, I have work, interviews with two more lawyers (where I get to dredge up my dreaded past baggage), and then I will either have a martini or go to dog training, depending on how I feel.  I do not deserve the "gymrat" title this week, as I haven't worked out since last week, unless you count linedancing last night.

Karla, how HORRIBLE for the parents of that girl and the carnage that it leaves behind for everyone who knew her.  I am still "reeling" from my work colleague who did the same, leaving four daughters, a wife, his parents, four siblings, and the "friends" around him.  :(  GR, thanks, as always, for your insights into everyone's "issues."  You are so kind to us all.  :)  Jean, welcome back, and how wonderful for you to have had that time with your daughter!  SJ, running at 6?!  That's FAST!  But I empathize on how you feel after a good cardio workout.  I used to do that frequently, but my foot still hurts me too much for cardio like that with my foot.  :(

Have a great day, everyone...I have way too much to prepare for with these legal interviews/reviews!  YUCK.  *^$&^$($#$()$(__&*(&^*$#%

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Community Leader
Registered: 04-05-2002
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 9:47pm

Good job on the running! I find running to be the most taxing workout and you fight for improvement. I love the idea of the daffodils along the path. I'll bet it would be quite the impact.  I've always thought that we should do something in the name of people who are victims of tragedies--something like plant a tree for each person or vow to do an act of kindness per person. Can you imagine how awesome it would be if people who were caring did a random act of kindness for each child who died in Sandy Hook?  It could be such an uplifting action on the world. A nonprofit could sell cards that the person could pass out that talked about the child he/she was doing it for.  Sales of the cards would go towards their choice of non-profits.  It could never take away the pain but it could help.






Community Leader
Registered: 04-05-2002
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 9:42pm

That sounds like a great service you all did for your father.  It must have been touching, in a such a positive way.  

Did you really get a 27???  That's more than anyone else I've read! I'm just off the beaten white path.;-)  OTOH, I'd probably score even lower in a how asian are you quiz.

Good luck with the lawyer!  Hope this one is the winner.






iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 9:20pm
Well, I am surprised to learn that I am 'Not White' because all these years, I thought I was....maybe I am just unaware? Jean,I love the idea of spending the funeral money on planting flowers. Thousands of daffodils have been planted along the marathon route this year...for a while I didn't think they would bloom in time, buti think they will be perfect. My mother didn't want any funeral service, but I always told her I would do what my brother needed...we had a family only service that he lead, and we asked people to share stories. - it was really wonderful, and what I think I would like for my dad - which is odd in a way because they divorced so long ago and had not a lot in common - but in some ways, are very alike. FSN, I hope you have found the right lawyer for you. I would have difficulty sustaining the fight for so long and would be tempted to pay anything to make tigon way. Is there an end once your children reach a certain age? I ran this morning before lifting...I ran 4/10s of a mile without stopping, then 2/10's twice..ended up with a total of two miles in 26:49...really. Good for me. Then lifting for shoulders, bis, tris, then abs.
Community Leader
Registered: 09-25-2003
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 8:24pm

Funny, but my mom insisted that my dad's service was a, "Celebration of Life."  My relatives commented that the service was the most uplifting that they had been to.  I spoke, representing the family, and reminded everyone that just as my dad touched their lives, each person there touched HIS life in a positive way.  I learned so much about my dad that day!  It was the most positive service I went to.  I feel blessed that he was in my life!  :D

I am more white than you, GR?  I got a 27.  :O  They call me a "twinkie."  lol.

I am feeling SO RELIEVED, after interviewing one of the three lawyers today. Dh said, based on my demeanor, I should just hire him...but I never make a big decision without "sleeping on it."  I felt like it was a "sign" that he also has a bull mastiff (that he met me at the office door with), he is getting a bull mastiff puppy in two weeks (that I made him promise that I can meet), and that he wears cowboy boots.  I also liked that although he is super short, he did not have a "short man's complex," which I admire.  His rates are super high, but, then, my guess is that supply and demand dictates his pricing?  I have two more interviews on Monday, but I don't feel very motivated about them.  Life is better today!

Community Leader
Registered: 04-05-2002
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 6:57pm

Ha, I'd add an aerial silks over the casket for the people who've said they'd do it over my dead body... I've already said I wanted the money for a funeral to go towards planting bulbs on the slope so that every spring it'll be reminders of me on the double blacks.    Yeah, I'll join you on morbid humor.  But, I really am a believer in celebrating a person's life, not being sad over the death. Just wait until I find new passions to add onto this. It's going to be a wild celebration.






iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 6:13pm

Jean, at your earliest convenience, I'm going to need you to fill out your Advanced Health Directive that states your DNR preferences and add a clause that parkour will be available at the wake, literally, over your dead body.  Wink  Perhaps I have a morbid sense of humor today but that is cracking me up... 

Community Leader
Registered: 04-05-2002
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 5:31pm

I got about 6. Riding a unicycle is white? Hmmm... LOL at #67--never been the only white person in the room?  Ummm, yeah, since I'm not white.  I also didn't know BM was white but it makes sense. Now that I think of it that way, I'd love to go. I want to be the old Asian woman who does parkour and aerial silks at the Deviant Playground!  That would be really awesome.

Karla, indulge.  I know it might seem frivolous but honestly that's what I'd want for my funeral. For people not to be too serious and afraid to do the wrong thing. That and for them to parkour over my casket.  

SJ, that would be the hard part of a funeral--the others who are young and experiencing it for the first time.  That's a nice, heartfelt post.  






iVillage Member
Registered: 03-15-2004
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 3:09pm

I would guess that you'll be much more consoling after being waxed.  The comfort will float out of your body more easily and won't get tangled up in facial hair.  Right?  Right?!?!  

(My apologies.  I'm a bad person.  But you guys know that.  Just trying to add some levity.)  

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-08-2006
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 2:26pm
Karla, it will comfort your friend to know you are there. I have actually been to several wakes and funerals for young people - one of my cousins died at 18 having her wisdom teeth pulled - very freak occurrence; two of my high school classmates lost younger siblings to cancer; and most horribly, one of the boys in my high school class murdered another classmate. The hardest part to me was to see young people (although I was also a young person) experiencing grief for the first time. My grandmother, who lived in a time when childhood death was common, always said that when children died, they went straight to heaven and sat on Jesus' knee. She had a picture of Jesus in a garden surrounded by children, so the image is very visual to me. I believe that we are all here for exactly the amount of time we are meant to be, that we learn what we need to learn, and do what we need to do...and then God brings us home...to live forever in Paradise, where we will meet again. I am not a 'religious' person, but I have a strong sense that there is something after this - and I figure if I am wrong, it won't really matter. Anyway, just your presence will be comforting, and whatever that girl was suffering from, she is at peace now. Her race run, her journey done. You will hold her in your hearts, and acts of kindness will come from the tragedy. Sending you (((hugs))))
Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Thu, 04-17-2014 - 2:07pm

Fresh-what a nightmare with the lawyers!

Jean and Gym, I took that quiz...lol I'm pretty darn white. ;-)

I have to go to the funeral of my friends daughter tomorrow so I don't think I'll make it here. I have never been to a child's funeral so I can't begin to imagine how awful this is going to be. I am trying not to think about it too much. I went to the salon and got my hair colored and everything possible on my face waxed since I will be seeing all of my highschool friends. I felt guilty endulging knowing what my friend is going through. 

I'm going to run a few miles tonight and I think I'll make chicken salad for dinner. 

Have a good weekend!

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

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