Do you find it hard to say "no"?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Do you find it hard to say "no"?
10
Mon, 08-01-2011 - 8:37pm

Life is crazy and hectic, but you get the call, "Hey, can you do me a favor and ____fill in the blank

Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 12:07pm
Hahahaha-NO. I used to really have a hard time saying no but the older I get, the easier it seems to get.

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 12:08pm
I had to practice saying no to everything first - that helped a lot. It made me comfortable saying no, and it proved to me that I didn't turn into an evil, friendless, unloved, selfish and loathsome being. It helped me see what was important for me and what was not. It also taught me that there are various ways to say no.

It also made people appreciate me and what I do more, because they know that I don't say yes to everything - just to the people and causes I care for.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 10:11pm

I can't believe that you just told ME "no".

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Wed, 08-03-2011 - 10:13pm

Great point Poppy!

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-19-2008
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 12:33pm

Lol, I do have a really hard time saying no still....I tried working on it, but guilt sets in and then I give in. That is one thing I really need to work on :)

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Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 2:17pm
lol yeah-good ole guilt. I usually say no because I don't have time and since I don't have time to do something I don't usually have time to think about what it was I didn't have time to do so I don't feel guilty. LOL

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 10:47pm

Hi Cara,

I have a very similar problem.

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Thu, 08-04-2011 - 10:50pm

Karla, You crack me up.

iVillage Member
Registered: 08-08-2011
Mon, 08-08-2011 - 2:54pm
I always felt like it was rude to say no -- but then I realized (not sure when it hit me, but thank god it did) that everytime I said yes to someone, it meant that I was giving away time that could be spent on things that mattered more to me -- like time for ME, or time for my kids, or time for working out, or spending with my husband. I decided that I needed to be a little more selfish (doesn't that sound bad?) in order to be happier. I do help out on projects and with events and when other people need me -- but only if it fits in to the amount of time I have allotted for those kinds of activities. It has made a huge impact on my life, my relationships, and my wellbeing -- for the better. I have to remind myself that being selfish isn't bad!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-26-2001
Mon, 08-08-2011 - 11:13pm

What a great way to look at it, Signa_strom!