Expectations

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Expectations
23
Mon, 11-08-2010 - 8:47am

“The only thing you can control is your own effort.”
~ Theodora van den Beld

Are your expectations for other people high, normal or low?

Have people often disappointed you with what they delivered/how they reacted? Were your expectations too high or were did these people just not act or reacted or done something that was up to par?

What kind of acheiver are you yourself?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:26am
It looks like you now have more realistic expectations for you yourself and those around you, Ting. It's probably less stressful for everyone concerned and less disappointing for you.

I think when it comes to ourselves we need to see what we're happy and comfortable with. I know quite a lot of people who are unhappy overachievers, and somehow that's wrong, too. When working on a project with others or for a client, I try to see what their expectations are and that's what I aim for, unless the expectations are unrealistically high or low.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:30am

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:34am

Kelly, I've encountered the same thing at work, too. It's difficult to continue to have expectations if people don't have high expectations of the work that they do or if they don't know that they can have better or higher expectations of themselves.

I also have to fight that belief that I need to be able to learn a new task immediately and get it perfect immediately, too. If we're not gentle on ourselves, who will be?

iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:42am
I've actually changed my expectations for the 12 year old because I know that surging hormones and developing brains are two things that are not easy to deal with. So right now my expectations are higher than what he'd like, but temporarily lower than what I'd like it to be and working towards what I want them to be. Did that make sense? LOL!
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:44am
Molly, has it been easy to let things go?
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 12:46am
Brigitte, one thing I always tell my nephew is that now that we know where we made the mistake, or now that we know how something is done, the next time we *will* and have do better because we've got that experience!
iVillage Member
Registered: 03-20-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 7:26am
thank you Poppy, that's Coffee who right now is chasing squirrels from indoors (window to window ) too muddy for her to go out.

have a nice weekend Poppy....
Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Fri, 11-12-2010 - 11:42am

Thanks Poppy for your kind words...:)

Yes she is moved, she is finding it to be a much better living situation.

She has her own room, and shares the kitchen and bathrooms.

Her rent is a little higher but she has access to laundry and she feels much more comfortable there.

I am so glad she found something.

<3

Nightangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Sat, 11-13-2010 - 9:56am
Coffee looks so very smart and chic in that red outfit!

I hope that you have a nice week-end, too, Suzan.
iVillage Member
Registered: 11-16-2001
Sat, 11-13-2010 - 9:58am
Lorie, that is such good news. If must be a huge relief for all of you that she's not only found a new place but one that she likes and is actually a much better living situation for her.

Her old flatmate having to move out turns out to have been a sort of blessing in disguise, then. I hope that it's still easy for the two of you to see each other, and that she gets along with her new flatmates.

Have a good week-end!