Introducing myself - Hi! Relapse of panic disorder

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anonymous user
Registered: 12-31-1969
Introducing myself - Hi! Relapse of panic disorder
Wed, 08-08-2012 - 9:40am

Hi, everyone! My name's Christine, I'm a 38-year-old mom to one teenage son (17), and I've been married to DH for almost six years. I'm experiencing a relapse of panic disorder, and decided to come here to receive and give support. And I used to co cl a divorce board here, too...YEARS ago :smileyhappy:

To make a long story short, a little over 10 years ago, I was diagnosed with panic disorder. For a period of time, I was practically housebound. I was able to get a few places, like the grocery store, my son's preschool, etc., but some days, I couldn't do much other than sit on the corner of the couch in a constant state of panic. After finding a medication that worked and going to therapy, after about six months, I started to feel much better and began a new job (I stayed there for 11 years).

Since I felt I recovered so well, I decided I wanted to go into mental health so I could help others. I did finish grad school for counseling a little over a year ago, but from the beginning, I wasn't sure if it was a good fit, because the work often triggered some anxious feelings for me and the pace of agency work is very intense.

Fast forward to today. I started developing some health problems (night sweats, fainting, heat intolerance) a coupld of months ago, right before I started a new job at an agency (I had only interned at an agency before). In addition to coping with these medical problems, I've been totally overwhelmed with my new job as a counselor in an agency, and started having panic attacks again. 

So here I am! I'm out on medical leave right now, but as a new employee, it's unlikely I'll have a job to which I can go back. In a way, that might be a blessing, because it's just too much for me, but financially, unless I can keep collecting short-term disability for a while, it's going to be a bit of a mess. 

Thankfully, DH is wonderful and very supportive. 

Yep...a counselor with a mental health problem...who would have thought? :smileyhappy:

Anyway, I look forward to meeting all of you. 

Avatar for ubergeek
Community Leader
Registered: 09-23-2010
Tue, 08-14-2012 - 6:49pm

Hi & Welcome! I'm sorry I didn't welcome you sooner, I've been super sick the past week. Bleh.

I'm Erin, married to my DH for 12 years, together 16. We've got two kiddos—ds (11) who is special needs and dd (14 months) who is getting into everything. :smileywink: 

My ds was born with a brain vein malformation which went undiagnosed until he was 1yr 11 days old. At that point he needed emergency brain surgery. I think that's when I finally truly snapped and it's been downhill ever since. I've become a true pessimist and anxious over everything—always waiting for the other shoe to drop. I can really work myself up into a full-on attack like no other, lol. I think the fact that I knew something was wrong with him prior to the surgery and his ped telling me no, that I was just a new mom at 23 who was overreacting kind of makes me feel like I have no control of anything and why I am always so anxious. Because you just never know. 

Anyway, that's my story. :smileyhappy: I've got anxiety which I'm back on meds for as well as social phobia. I had seen a therapist a while back and she said that I am a true introvert and hate the spotlight and because my ds has issues and is extremely outgoing (yet inappropriate at times due to his issues) it sets my anxiety off. Yeah. LOL I've learned to ignore/brush-off some of the less embarrassing things, but there are times where we are out and I just want to crawl into a hole.