I don't know what is wrong with me and I need help.

iVillage Member
Registered: 07-09-2014
I don't know what is wrong with me and I need help.
Wed, 07-09-2014 - 9:56pm

I guess I just want to start out with how I am a really bad test taker. I just can't focus, I have to move, I sweat alot, and I just stress out. I also can't focus in class and I can't stand being bored in class. I recently self-harmed, I have about 200 cuts and some burns. I have moments of like ticks where I have to create or do something like write music, paint, melt plastic, create a store, write a book, etc but i later just don't find the energy to finish it and it just was an idea. When i feel this way I usaully jsut show i am happy when i am really sad and think about killing myself. I also have a fear of something. A constant fear for me is that someone can see through a mirror and see me or that someone is judging me. I constantly look at my surroundings and I have to have a friend near. What does this mean, where can I get help, and how do I do better in school and life?

Avatar for sunset5000
Community Leader
Registered: 10-10-2007

Welcome to our board!

My apology for not responding to your post much sooner.

Are you doing any better?

You mentioned that you have thought about killing yourself.  Please please seek help.  You can go to the nearest ER, you can call 911 or you can call the National Suicide Prevention Lifeline at:  1-800-273-TALK at anytime.  Please please let someone know your feeling suicidal and get help immediately.

You mentioned school, are you in middle school, high school, or college?  Is there anyone at school whom you can discuss your thoughts and feelings with?  Any family or friend you feel comfortable sharing how you are feeling with?

I hope I have gave you some ideas of where to begin to get some help.  If I have not helped, please feel free to reply and let me know if there is anything else I can help you with or if you have any questions, ANYTIME!!!!

Again, my sincere apology for you not getting a reply to your post on here sooner.

Please let us know how you are doing now, ok?  Cyber hug!!