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|Thu, 10-03-2013 - 11:53am|
I haven't been on IVillage since the changes. Was never able to log on. I miss all my IVillage peeps. But today I thought I would give it a try as I am feeling really down. Let's see if I can get this to post.
So much going on in my life. I don't know where else to turn. Can't afford professional help, went the preacher route (which helped for awhile). My biggest issue is the death of my dad and all that has crumbled since then but many other issues before that. My marriage is just two people living together for convenience sake and has been for a very long time. Major financial issues. My beautiful daughter has medical issues and has since she was born. My very best friend, whom I met here on IVillage, took her own life and left me at a time when I needed someone the most, my dad passing away after caring for him for two years after finally repairing our relationship, dealing with my family falling apart since his passing and my mom is ill too and I am the one expected to care for her. I mentally can't do it anymore. Losing my dad and the loss that has brought has given me the most empty feeling. I've struggled with depression all my life. When my dh had a great job and insurance, I was able to get help, and boy did it ever help, but not anymore. I try to use the tools I learned then it seems life slaps me back down. I feel so lonely, down, lost, empty. And it is all taking a physical toll. I honestly don't know where else to turn, so I thought I would try here. I feel like I could write a book if I told you all every thing. But, first I am hoping this will post and testing this out.