silently struggling

Avatar for sunset5000
Community Leader
Registered: 10-10-2007
silently struggling
Wed, 07-31-2013 - 7:38pm

I wanted to vent a moment.  I am having a really hard time with many aspects in my life.  I could make a list.  I try to stay positive and not dwell on the negatives, but some days, I just feel I don't have the strength to put on a smile and pretend everything is great.  Sometimes I feel like there is something pushing me to my limit too see how much I can handle.  Anyone feel this way?

I talk to friends, but it is not just one problem in my life, it is so many different things and people.  I always thought I was good at handling whatever came my way, but for awhile now, I have really been struggling "inside" and no one knows, that is why I came here.  I am sad.

Thanks for listening.

Community Leader
Registered: 05-04-2011
Thu, 08-01-2013 - 1:46pm

Heidi, you are never alone.  I don't know what else to say...but know that you have friends who care for you, including me.  *hugs*

iVillage Member
Registered: 05-09-2010
Thu, 08-01-2013 - 3:53pm

I completely understand where you are coming from. It helps to talk and this is definitely somewhere you can spill all and not worry about repurcussions. I thought I was great at handling everything but realized I needed more than just myself to rely on. That's why I am here.

I may not be able to "do" anything but I sure can "listen".

Avatar for sunset5000
Community Leader
Registered: 10-10-2007
Sat, 08-03-2013 - 10:21pm

Thank you Rhae, Thank you Nancy for your replies.

I appreciate all the support on this board.  Today, I am just flat out sad.  No motivation, no energy, no interest in much of anything, which is hard to accept.  I hate having to force myself to do just the simple daily living tasks that we all do.  I am sleepy alot, that is where I seem to find comfort.  I just hate feeling this way!!!!!!  ugh

I wish there was a chat system that us on this board could all log on and chat together and support each other.  I can call friends, but they don't have depression and they just ask me why are you down, what happened today?  Having been diagnosed with depression, for me, nothing happened today, I have no reason to tell them, so they get confused, know what I mean?

Thanks again for letting me ramble.

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Mon, 08-19-2013 - 10:38pm

Hi Heidi,

I can so relate...I have been "Silently Struggling" to...

It's been three months since we took my sil off Life-Support and it's been one year ago since my friend was murdered...

Add to ALL of this my health issues and I just found out I have Cataracts...:(...

My heart goes out to you because it is so very hard to wear that mask around our family and friends...

Here I know I can come and honestly share my feelings and others here will understand...

I finally decided I neede to up the dosage of my Anti-depressant...

Just recently I got a new NP and she is Wonderful!

Depression is really hard to live with and I try to be Positive but it's hard...

I am considering some other counselling and possibly some groups...

So sorry to hear you are having a tough and rough time right now.

Just wanted to let you know you aren't Alone and I definitely do understand.