What I'm working on
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|Mon, 01-16-2012 - 12:19am|
I mad the mistake of weighing myself and I have indeed gained way more than I'm comfortable with and needless to say I'm having trouble finding the will to keep going. However, I'm trying to shift focus. Why did I wanna get better? Well, I sometimes forget why :/ It doesn't matter. I know I gotta do this or I'm dead...literally :/ I'm trying to work with the small part of me that still wants to live.
So...the word of the day. Empowerment!! What makes me feel empowered? Other than ED that is 0_o
Freedom!!! The thought of actually being free to live my life the way I want to is empowering.
I'm slowly learning how to take control over my own life. No...I may not be able to control situations or circumstances but it's okay. I heard something interesting today. If it isn't adding to me it's taking from me. This ED has taken enough from me. It hasn't fixed anything. If anything, it's way worse than before. Now I know better. If I go down I'll do it kicking and screaming. The ED is in for a fight.
Maryah is empowered and getting free everyday :)