Can you blame your low self esteem on anything in particular?

Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
Can you blame your low self esteem on anything in particular?
8
Wed, 04-13-2011 - 8:19am

Maybe it was a teacher who told you that you were dumb or your mother calling you fat or lazy? Is there anything in particular you think may have contributed to your low self esteem?

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2006
getting picked on by other kids for being nerdy :) now i know they were just jealous!
Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
lol I was a nerd! Probably a good thing for me that I didn't know what "nerd" meant huh? ;)

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001

For me personally it was probably a combination of things.

One being molested as a child and later on being in an "Abusive" marriage and later relationships that were not healthy.

I think things changed when I went through an assault and rape and for the first time in my Life I think that my self-esteem started to change. I realized that I was to blame or at fault for what had happened to me.

My self-worth and self-esteem have slowly hopefully started to go from low to higher.

I am a work in progress.

<3

Nightangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2006
lol the first appearance of the word "nerd" was in a dr. seuss book from the 1950s. so i guess only he knew what the word truly meant :)
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2006
yep, you are a work in progress!

when you say that you realized you were to blame or at fault for what happened to you, do you mean that you stopped thinking of yourself as a victim and started taking responsibility?
Community Leader
Registered: 04-07-2008
lol!

Karla
Community Leader
WALKING
EXERCISE and HEALTHY LIVING

Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001

I have never thought of myself as a "Victim".

Personally I thought of myself ONLY as a "Survivour", and now as a "Thriver"...

What I realized is that it was not my fault and I was not to blame.

When that happens that's when you can work on your low self-esteem and self-worth.

You begin raising your self-confidence.


Nightangel
iVillage Member
Registered: 10-12-2006

oh, okay - i think in your initial post you said that you realized that you were to blame, not that you were not to blame. this makes a lot more sense now :-) of course it wasn't your fault, but i can see how you would've believed that you somehow were responsible (maybe it made you a "bad person", who caused bad things to happen, etc.). i'm glad that you figured it out, though.