How do you learn to love yourself?

iVillage Member
Registered: 01-16-2013
How do you learn to love yourself?
Sun, 10-27-2013 - 9:27am

Everyone keeps saying you have to love and accept yourself in order to be happy but how do you get there??

Community Leader
Registered: 01-04-2004
Tue, 11-12-2013 - 9:54pm
maybe practice "not hating" and "not rejecting" yourself....when you think a negative thought about yourself, ask yourself if you really believe it and why. a lot of times the negative thought patterns aren't really your own; you've acquired them from what others have said to you or about you over the years (maybe your parents were really critical, for example) and just accepted them as "the truth". looking at it analytically can help you figure out what you truly believe. this works for me because i like to analyze things, and it's helped me develop a neutral mindset. i'm not in love with myself but i don't hate myself, either. does that make sense?
Community Leader
Registered: 12-21-2001
Mon, 10-28-2013 - 2:05am

Namaste Phyllis,
The suggestions of nightangel are wonderful as is her quote.
To some extent you have taken a step, you are aware that you may need to do more to enhance your self- esteem.  Have you tried reading about self-esteem and attmpting some of the things talked about in them.
I know in google you can set alerts of articles of a topic, you probably can elsewhere also.  Have you read any articles or books? 
I use to write myself little 'pick me up notes' and leave them around the house.
"I am wonderful and capable" was taped to the front door, so that I would see it
Whenever I went out the door.
"I feel pretty, and witty, and wise"  was kept in  2 places-the bathroom and closet.
Be kind to yourself and take 'baby steps' but don't be afraid to learn to run.
Community Leader
Registered: 10-22-2001
Sun, 10-27-2013 - 11:19am

Baby Steps...;)...

I did take a Self-Esteem Group and that has really helped.

Surround yourself with people who are Positive and Supportive...

Every day do something nice for yourself...